Sitting in Saturday

He opened his eyes, just enough to squint, and tried to prepare his mind for the reality that would hit him soon after waking. He could still feel the heat on his hands from the fire just hours before. Over and over again he heard the sound of the rooster crowing, as those moments of his memory clung to him, like reckless children who refused to accept that their time of rest had come. "Aren't you one of them?""Surely you were with him!""Don't you know this man?"He sat up, as the moments of the last 24 hours flooded his conscience without mercy. He is dead. Yet he could still remember those words, "Do not let your hearts be troubled. If you believe in God also believe in me." He is really dead. Yet, he could feel the coolness of the water on his feet as they were being washed, the roughness of the bread on his tongue, the sweet bitterness of the wine..."Do this in remembrance of me."And now, he is dead. He took a deep breath, and tried to hold onto the scent of his beloved; to bury himself in his garments as he once did, head to bosom, listening to the heartbeat and breath of the one who had the words of life. But now, he is dead. And there only remained the stench of blood and ripped flesh and the cry of being forsaken. Peter felt the bitterness suddenly rush to the back of his throat, and barely made it out of his bed in time. Afterward he rinsed his mouth, threw water on his face and wept. 

I saw this image on my Facebook newsfeed and thought, "What a privilege that statement is for us who live on this side of the resurrection." How easy must it be for us to have faith already knowing the end of the story? How quickly do we move to the celebration without stopping to realize what we are in fact celebrating.

Jesus died.
For us.
He took on the weight of the world's sin for all time and died a death at the hands of the ones he came to save.

BUT THEN!....

Wait, lets just wait right here.

Yes, He rose, but why is it so hard to sit in Saturday?  To live in that space of void where Jesus is dead?

Saturday is not simply about getting ready for Sunday in anticipation, although there is a part of it. Saturday is first acknowledging the void, of waking up to the painful realization of a world without Christ. It is acknowledging the darkness, and thereby acknowledging the need that allows us to receive and celebrate in the fullness of joy.

There are areas in our lives, whether we'd like to admit it or not, where Jesus is dead. There is so much bitterness, pain, hurt, and strife in those areas that we refuse to receive the resurrection power of Christ. There is indeed a void.

So sit in the darkness. Acknowledge it. Let its reality be the starting and launching point for your anticipation of faith. Yet, it is hard to bear, but there is something about finding the courage to look death in the face and say, "I see you. I know you. But you are not the end..."